Debating is not an easy activity to be engaged in.

You have to bow down to the whims of the jury and try your best to convince them that you are right. To be told that you are wrong would make one feel queasy and we tend to dismiss the criticism as misguided, when we truly need to reflect within ourselves to decipher what went wrong.

Debating thwarts any ego that you may hold dear, for it purely tests you upon the merit of your words and logic, no flash or bling can ever substitute that. The entry point to the activity may be restricted but post your advent, it's only the polemic of reasoning that triumphs.

I started out in 2014 not really thinking about how far I am willing to take this. Well, it’s 2020 yet the passion for this activity still remains as unrestrained as it was, some six years back.

People would like to believe that one needs to be proficient and coherent with spoken English in order to debate, however, I lacked that privilege. My familial and academic upbringing ensured that English would be a language employed only in the most formal settings.

The key to mastering a language does not solely lie in the consumption of its literature but in the explicit act of speaking it. Having daily, informal conversations in that language permits one to naturally think in the same language. People who have English as a second language usually translate sentences from their mother tongue before speaking or have to consciously form sentences before uttering them, which is different from what a native or avid speaker would do. To them speaking in English comes as naturally as clicking their fingers, it does not require any conscious effort. A luxury I lacked.

To achieve the same pedestal, the underprivileged have to work twice as hard, if not more, than the people who are privileged.

Do not get me wrong, I’m sufficiently privileged in my own way, with a family that supports my exuberance for debating and coaches who have gone out of their way to lend a helping hand, whenever required, but the barrier of language was one that would indubitably impede my progress.

I had to make a choice. I could either cut ties with this indulgence and accept that it was not for me or I could mindlessly go through the grind, with an utter disregard for what may follow.

I will not sugarcoat; it was super tough, initially. It started with something as simple as talking out loud in my room, addressing the person I saw in the mirror. Translating conversations from my mother tongue to English in my mind, I would visualize myself talking to the protagonist of the movie I just watched.

Having gained nothing but a string of defeats in an year, despite working so hard was heart wrenching and I still do not know what kept me going, back then. Perhaps it had something to do with this sense of meaning I had attached to this activity. Or it was just my idealistic self yearning for a moment of glory, a typical tale of how David knocked Goliath down, against all odds. Maybe I just wanted to prove myself, and my abilities as a debater; it could have been any of them but what truly fascinates me about debating is this little feeling within myself.

The rush I experience when the motion is announced and I have 15 minutes to prepare my case; that surge of energy I feel when I realise I've got that silver bullet that would destroy the opposition’s case or the tingling sensation when my teammate gives a hair raising, enthralling speech and I see the opposition expressing apparent awe, caught unawares.

It’s that period, during the debate, that I cherish the most: an unparalleled wave of fervour swallowing you, sending you to debateland where you forget everything else.

Not that I mean to brag. However, it is not bragging if you back it up, is it? I was Maha-Behes Runners Up in 2015 and Champion in 2016 and 2017. Debates will win you numerous accolades if you stay in the field for long, but too many end their journey citing lack of wins, which sounds preposterous.

In retrospect, for me, it was never about the win. It has always been about everything that preceded it: the zeal to think unabashedly and say out loud what you wanted to, without any fear of what comes next. That state of mind, it just cannot be messed with. That is when I feel invincible. Victory is just the cherry on top of a very tasty cake.